I’ve been double checking and you are definitely my sidekick.

Look, I don’t know how you keep popping up on my screen like this,
but frankly, I wish you’d fuck off.

That sounds like you.

I am nobody’s sidekick, thank you very much.

But you are!

And you are some cyberbullying voyeur.

Sorry, I don’t know what that means, but I hate bullies.

How are you doing this? Is it some kind of viral thing?

I’m off school with a bug if that’s what you mean.
Actually, my headache is a fake. I’m fine really.
Although faking a headache does give me a headache after a while!